rest

I never thought that a five-day rest from MetroManila could bring a reinvigorated feeling within me. it is not something that is easily acquired here. it is something sought after all. you see, harassment comes in various forms in our country -- starting from hits at age, to hits at dark skin, hits at being single and without a boyfriend, to being called smelly and dirty. despite the developments of technology, there are really forces that cannot accept contrary opinions, all in the name of money and power.

how i pray and hope that this administration would wither away quickly and give us a new breathing space with which to exercise our humanity. the thing is, our whole lives are taken up parrying all those harassments, analyzing how we can move institutions to stop them, and afterwards ending up so tired that not an ounce of solution seems directed to their final termination.

money is what strengthens these harassers to continue their operations. i did not know that gloria could be that ingenious to know how to manipulate some people's desire for power and greed.

but anyway, God will provide the final answer.

email eureka

I have just recovered my email address. my goodness it looks like google philippines is not so reliable when it comes to protecting our passwords. it has been infiltrated by bugs.

anyway, am i glad to be back in circulation. but sometimes i get email fatigue, a dis-ease that makes us distance ourselves from reading kilometric sentences that point nowhere. at bacolod city, i was able to read emails, uninterrrupted and with speed during the first two days. on the third day, bugs set in, slowing down operations. and on my last day, i could no longer open my emails.

the world has to find a way of correcting this intellectual aberration of other people destroying communication, and on top of that, invading privacies. i think this is a subtle form, a development from the SSS operations during Hitler's regime. it strikes at the root of people's consciousness which makes them vulnerable to blind obedience to unseen forces, and to mute acquiescence to all types of mental manipulation.

there has to be an end to evil in this world

Less Harassed

I thinkthat the establishment here in this country is getting less paranoid. I am less harassed now, or was yesterday a lie low time for them? I carried a small placard which had the caption: SA ILALIM NG M. LAW, ANG TAUMBAYAN WALANG SARILING PAG-IISIP AT WALANG OPINYON. Many women passengers on board the MRT were reading it but their faces were bland, no reaction. Are the Filipino people immune, callous, desensitized to activism already? The extent of harassment and government reaction to critical thinking has taken a toll on the people's political standpoint.

Or is it the media? Have the media not allowed the people to voice out their grievances, so much so that the people are always waiting for them now to take up the issues and speak for them? There should always be space for assessing how powerful media could be in terms of speaking about issues but not always speaking for the people?

Or is it possible that the people are mesmerized by the kind of officials we have -- who all come from the elite, affluent and speaking English all the time?

Amid all these, on the other side of the globe, the American people are in preparation to decide who will lead them next January 2009 up.

It must be very exciting for them. But I wonder, how honest their elections would be. One US official was asked here how elections had been after bush was declared winner. and he said, "We Americans learn from your elections," and he was talking about the counting in Florida.

Really now!

---Yesterday, I went to Makati to get my loyalty reward phone from Globe and to get my celfone fixed. The guy there said that it would be sent to my son's place. When I told him that I had talked already to the Globe in Quezon Ave, and they told me that I could just come today, 21st of Septmber and get the unit. He viewed his computer and then said that all I have to do is call up the hotline, 7301000.

Bureaucrat!

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I finished my Supreme Court Memofor Reconsideration, detailing my stint at the Inquirer from 89 to 91, why I should have been regularized for working as a regular columnist weekly for almost three years earning a pittance of 300 pesos per article.

In it, I delved into historical and theoretical issues about communication. How a big newspaper like the Inquirer could take advantage of idealistic writers (hint, like me) and pay me a patsy amount just because it could hire writers, make them submit articles and pretend that no employer-employee exists.

Having fun

Sun May 18, 2008 4:38 pm (PDT)
Folks lets have a bit of relaxation. Take this quiz and see if you are astaunch democrat or anti-democrat:



1. To strengthen PPP we need to do one of the following:

a. Let every member drink Milo;

b. Offer malunggay leaves to everyone;

c. Impose the reading of the works of Marx, Lenin, Mao Ze Dong books;

d. Stop talking about PPP and help the Republicans of USA win elections;

e. Make all the members of PPP come home and recruit members in theHomeland.

f. Raise funds to support recruitment by selling fans containing the logoPPP and the caption: "PPP, Juday's Party! Support Us!"



2. To solve the country's problems, do which one?

a. Have a snap presidential election;

b. Go to Boracay and have a lazy weekend;

c. Build a monument for all the heroes in front of DPWH, the most corruptdepartment;

d. Meet with all the bank hold-uppers and tell them to point their gunsat all corrupt officials;

e. Sing Lupang Hinirang in front of every government office, and have abanner: "Oy, pera namin yan. Walang kurakutan!"

f. Have a signature campaign and make GMA remove herself from Malacanang.



3. To solve the war in Iraq, what do we do?

a. Sign peace all over Washington D.C.

b. Sign peace all around UN premises in NYC.

c. Draw pictures of Muslim women and children at every bus stop

d. Put up statistics of the number of Filipinos killed in Middle East wars.

e. Put up statistics of the number of soldiers killed, by nationality in theIraqui war;f. Draw the face of Bush praying for Sadam Hussein's soul

internet writing

using the internet outside the home is a great burden. Many always have their radios blaring or their cps tuned in to the music spot. i always have to ask the counter person to tone it down. next, users almost always have friends around them when they play computer games. well u see Filipinos are happiest when with their friends and or relatives. you can imagine the raucous talking that occurs. Then, maintenance of the keyboards is not being properly followed. This one for example, the cursor runs a few inches away now and then. Another time, the tab enter kept getting depressed so that I could not encode anything. The worst is of course when I can't even open my email. Today, my email was shut down. Then I searched for my blog. Luckily I got through that one. now i am able to write my blog. but sorry, the typographical errors are aplenty. I have no more time to check.

Oh, the worst of the worst was this internet cafe by Aurora Boulevard, the Gameline internet. As i was writing my email, the owner shut it down because he said my time was up, without any reminder at all. so i complained and said that internet business is not only "kabig" or getting money, he got so mad. now our battle is up at the barangay for his rudeness.

Hay Folks, life in the Philippines is full of trials and travails. So long.

Wait and see

I am not located in a hospitable environment right now. Machismo is falling all over the place and I am feeling so creepy that after all these years, I would still find fellows who think that the world revolves around them and that everyone will bow down to them.

One guy I know had a terrible relationship with a woman whom he ordered around to be his caregiver while he was having problems of making his gf stay with him in the house. When the girl did, he made the woman their maid. Imagine, aftrer being a caregiver, she became a servant, literally to the couple. I am glad that she has moved out of the house to get her bearings again.

I don't have to tell you about the other guy. But there are also hidden guys trying to manipulate my life, peering into everything I do so that my personal life has been so affected that I refuse to look at anyone. Surprisingly, the guys I find most likeable have effeminate qualities but are not gay. The balance of yin and yang in their personhood is very engaging. So while talking to them, I find myself not feeling intimidated, and that I could easily reveal what I feel to them.

In the midst of all the convoluted political situation we are in, I take note of every opposite sex I meet to find out how they are reacting. Some meet them head on. Others avoid the situation, clam up, and let others do the talking. But later on, some of them do stand up.

Wait and see. Wait and see is the best policy.

Losing Friends

As I am now a freelance writer, I find keeping friends very difficult to do. I have to exert extra effort to see, talk and be with them for a cup of tea. But it is always a great experience once I am able to connect with them. E. has been myf riend since the 80's. We met at Nairobi, where she was photographing many Filipino women, one of whom was Carlita Doran, the inventress. The latter was putting up her inventions on a small hill and showcasing her solid alcogas which is used for lighting up fondue. Today, Carlita is exporting many of her inventions and is living a fine life.

E and I bcame deeper friends as she became my editor for many articles of mine which I wrote for an Asian news syndicate. Unfortunately, as contributor, I never received any other benefits after writing for so many years, except the fees per article. Yet, my writings were farmed out in the regional newspapers. Worse yet, a leading newspaper in the Philippines would even delete my name and just publish the article without any byline, just the name of the syndicate, a case of jealousy of the editor-in-chief I guess. Another friend D., told me that the ed was jealous of me because my writings were popularly read. Anyway, I was not asking for popularity, never at all until now. To me writing is a duty, an obligation. I prefer being known as a filmmaker, not as a writer.

E and I are still friends and she has retired as a writer, or probably does some other editing stuff now and then. We have tea or coffee in Makati now and then just to update ourselves of our lives.

Another friend was D, also a writer. I had tea with him once. When it was my turn to treat him, he was either too busy, sick, or I was already out of the environment he was in. Anyway, we kept in touch through text messaging. Talking with him is being intellectually stuffy. And I got to write an article well because of his inputs, as the article landed on the front pages of a newspaper. But you know what? His last text to me was very bad. So I did not answer it. He wrote something about being frigid. What? Just because I would not sleep with him or maybe I was too unreceptive to his overtures, then he would hint at my being frigid?

Well, I just kept silent because as far as I am concerned, sexuality is a personal matter and that being intimate with a person is not a fastfood type of activity. Ha ha! Goodness, here in the Philippines, sometimes I seem to get the message that for me to be able to get a favor, I have to come with the package. Yikes! Anyway, I lost D as a fiend already, oops, friend. I don't really fancy dealing with people who are using their writings for hitting at their friends, underhandedly. He should just have come up front and told me what he wants. And maybe I would have said...No, thanks.

Well, another friend I had or probably still has is L. He is a corporate guy, who is very cool. But his world is very narrow and I think he wants me to revolve around his work environment. Now as I am in the middle of helping put up a political party, I don't really find it practical to be involved in his milieu, although the work would be very easy to do. I think I lost him partially because of my refusal.

He is nice and he reminds me of a friend I had in London, very prim and proper, and who is calculating of his moves, but terribly, terribly busy, as in BUSY. But actually, it was just a ruse. He did not fancy being over friendly with someone who would leave his country later on.

Well, friends are nice at particular periods of one's life. They perk up the dull periods, and inspire you to live from day to day. I guess I have to know first what I want in a friend, before I take on another one.

What do you think? I will dream on that.