new day

Today, I reviewed my emails, and saw bits and pieces of messages from the States. For many months I was involved in American politics, writing and receiving emails from various names ranging from Barack, to David, Jarrett, Michelle, the Presidential Inaugural Committee, Ted Daschle, and another one whose family name starts with M. I felt heady then, as there was something going on -- the election of the first Afro-American as president. The run-up period was particularly exciting as the Republics put up a vigorous fight to defeat the Democrats. But then of course, the rest is history. Then a new twist happened. The Barack team started emailing about joining the inauguration and my having to write why I wanted to attend. As weeks wore on, different people asked the same thing; so the same messages and the same requirement as to the reason for attendance. But at the last, when it was Barack who was signing the message, I stopped short because my son and daughter had cautioned me about its being a scam. Then the emails started saying that if I could not attend, then I could gather a group that would watch the video instead. There was something spooky about the way the reader was conditioned to think that I was a part of a big thing, that I had to do this and do that.

Although I am not an American, I felt compelled to respond to the game. Then it suddenly dawned on me, after writing that brief speech for Barack for 2012,Then I remembered what Kuya Dolly, my cousin, had told me: "I removed my name because baka kung sinu-sino lang ang nagsusulat noon at ang pumipirma ay si Barack daw, e hindi pala. (someone might have been writing those messages and then signing up as Barack, when it could have been just any other fellow.)

But as I told Ogening my son, life has many twists and turns; and also fake and genuine friends. One just has to coast along and should one proved to be a jerk, then that is his or her problem. Not mine, because I started everything from a solid and genuine commitment that American politics needs to be redirected to something that could fulfill the dreams not only of the American people, but all people around the globe.

So today, as I read my email, I felt a void, a relief also because I know that I have to fill up that void with something else, something more authentic, an authentic existence that can stand the tests of all kinds of political storms and stresses.